About Me

I’m just happy to be here. It took me a half century but I’m starting to figure it out. A good life starts with good thoughts. Our brains are programmable and we set the code. Good thoughts in and bad thoughts out and so it goes. Like most people, I’m irreverent, spiritual, jaded and trusting. I’m learning to admit fault quickly and accept apology with grace. I haven’t always been the perfect mother but my love is strong and I’m thankful I taught my children to accept my own apologies with grace. I don’t think marriage is essential for happiness but since I bought into the institution in my twenties I’m pretty damn thankful that the second time around I picked a guy who loves me no matter how I look in the morning. And the fact that he still makes my heart go crazy is a nice bonus. Life’s simple. We just like to make it complicated. Why "Holy Spoon?" Because sometimes life just seems to be a series of misinformation and misunderstandings. When I was young my family called the slotted spoon the “holy spoon” and in my childish brain I believed it held some religious significance. I’m not sure why I thought God cared about what was in our silverware drawer.

Friday, January 7, 2011

I'm Pretty Sure This Isn't What Facebook Had in Mind

     I know Facebook gets a bad rap for being a brain suck and I plead guilty to spending way too much time checking out my news feed. But, in the social media monster’s defense, I have to say it has also been a catharsis for me. I can’t be the only tail end baby boomer who grew up in a house where emotions were stifled.
     The learning curve when it comes to my feelings has been a long and bumpy road.  I’ve envied my children's ability to connect so easily with friends. Granted, I made sure from the moment I first saw their pretty little faces that they would grow up in a family that said “I love you” every day.  Sure enough, by breaking the cycle of emotional neglect that ran generations deep, I ended up with young adults who have way less emotional blockage than their mom.
     I didn’t have a clue when I signed up for a Facebook account that it would become not only a way to reconnect with friends but an outlet for feelings. (Resist the urge to break into the maudlin tune by the one hit wonder Morris Albert.)  You know how Internet trolls can hide behind a computer and spew verbal garbage at their targets? Slam that concept into reverse and you have a bunch of men and women sitting at computer screens confessing how much they love their kids, old friends and making wishes on dandelions. It’s lovely, really. As a self confessed lover of the Christmas letters that everyone else hates, my Facebook news feed is like one big guilty pleasure.
      As much as I love reading about what everyone is doing, it’s not all about voyeurism and stalking profiles.  Facebook has been a way for me to practice putting my own words out into the Universe and hearing back from friends and acquaintances that they’ve felt the exact same way. It’s a validation of my own emotions. While that may sound narcissistic I certainly don’t mean it that way. After a day spent working or tending to the emotional needs of others it’s pretty nice to know that I can write a post that makes people smile or relate to how I’m feeling. I think we all owe ourselves the freedom of expression and Facebook makes that so much easier. Just resist the urge to share your digestive ailments and hormone rages. None of us need to know about your gas and water retention.
    
    

2 comments:

  1. Barbara,

    Kudos on taking the leap into blogging! I do enjoy your FB posts, and I did burst out into laughter at your Christmas letter comment. I, on the other hand, give them the big eye-roll when I'm on let's say page 5 of their latest accomplishments. People, let's scale it down to a one pager, shall we?

    You definitely have the gift of the gab and clearly, the gift of putting pen to paper, or shall I say, fingers to keystrokes. I too emphasize feeling the love in our home as it was sorely lacking in my childhood, but I look at that as a gift from my parents on how not to parent=)

    I look forward to following the spoonfuls of knowledge, memories, perspective and laughter that the Holy Spoon will provide! Best wishes on your latest endeavor!

    Roma ;)

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  2. I think you're closer to writing that book than you think. I agree with the previous comment, you do have a talent for writing. Keep the posts coming because I'll be coming back to read them :).

    Jennifer Graff

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