Life's Quilt

     "When I was a child I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man I put away childish things." I love that passage from Corinthians. Every time I read it I think of the evolution from child to adult and how, even when we become adults, our hearts, our souls and our minds can continue to flourish. Of course, the childish things of our past are not cast out the moment we step into adulthood. Damn, wouldn't that make it easy. Instead, the remnants of our raising are woven so deeply into the quilt of our being that we must learn to stitch those tattered pieces together with new experiences.
     From the sweetness of childhood springs the angst of the teen. Isn't everything bigger than life? And so dramatic? A breakup means you just might die from the sadness. Grounded really does feel like grounded for life. A date to the prom is the best thing ever. If you don't get that car for your sweet sixteen your life will officially be over. And while the rest of your life feels like it passes by in the blink of an eye, the teen years seem to go on forever. The tumult from those years serves a greater purpose as we learn to navigate relationships and process and solve problems. Our life's quilt is getting bigger.
     The twenties. We're adults but our brains are only halfway there. We're expected to earn a living, pay our bills, and live like we're all grown up. The weekends are for partying and our bills haven't piled so high that we feel the strain of debt. For many of us, our parents are alive and kicking and our role as caretaker won't start for years and years. I've probably just managed to depress every twenty-something reader, but my true intent is this: love your life, love your friends, and live your dreams every day. Surround yourself with positivity. If there's a person in your life that makes it hell it's time to reassess. Keep the good, banish the bad.  Make your quilt stronger and more colorful.
     The thirties. We're putting it all together now. Maybe we're feeling a little cocky, too. The career is on track. We're starting a family. I'm still a bit mortified by some of my pit bull actions when I was thirty-something. In the workplace, I didn't take into account how my deeds affected others. Although I've never been to AA I admire their philosophy of going back and setting things right with people from your past. Maybe I should start my list. I should have used my quilt to warm and sustain others but I was pretty stingy with the life I was building.
     The forties can slap you in the face. What a wake up call. Growing kids are expensive and very, very complicated. Houses are money pits. My body ceased to defy gravity. Marriage required more work. Problems that I never saw coming threw us off track and it was harder and harder to steer back to the course. If you get through your forties with the marriage intact and your sanity in place you are blessed with the fifties. That quilt is life size now and the seams are strong from the reinforcing stitches.
     At the mid century mark I've adopted the se la vie attitude. Pick your battles never had more meaning. At this point in time, I've seen the blessings and tragedies of life and I say bring on the blessings because wallowing in the tragedies becomes tiresome and pointless. I love the fifties. My quilt is big enough for my family and friends and I choose to embrace the people that make my life richer.